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 JULY 2009 TIP OF THE MONTHTraining the Hard-headed Dog Imagine something a moment with me. For those of you knowing us, this will be funny and deadly accurate. Otherwise it illustrates a good story. Imagine my husband and me planning to take a week of vacation (that alone makes this a fictional work) in Palm Springs. We want to play golf on the wonderful courses they have there, idly going through the day, and stopping only to refuel and catch a show every now and then. Only thing is neither of us knows how to play golf or at least play golf well so we are going to take golf lessons.We locate a local pro that comes highly recommended. We call and make arrangements for private lessons and mine is first. I meet the pro at the course and we introduce ourselves. He tells me he hears I’m a dog trainer and exclaims that must be fascinating work – he has a dog himself and can hardly make it sit. I chuckle politely and he begins to tell me how he’s going to structure our lessons. He explains in detail what the point is in golf, the importance of hitting as few strokes as possible and getting into the hole quickly. Once he has hit the highlights he begins to explain what he is going to teach me, in what order and how he’s going to do it. He has my complete attention. I like him. Next we get out a club and some balls and he begins to explain to me how the manner in which you hit the ball is everything. He talks about stance, holding the club, hitting the ball correctly, etc. He wants me to practice a few times so he can see how I do it. I hit a few balls and he compliments me on my rhythm and strength. I like him. Then he suggests I move my feet slightly and hold the club a little differently. I make the adjustments and try real hard to hit the ball squarely. I do it and he suggests I do it a few more times. I comply and he compliments me on my understanding of his instructions and then suggests I change my grip and wrist position slightly and then alter where I look as I hit the ball. I really like this gentleman golf pro so I give it everything I have to do exactly as he says. At the end of our lessons he lists all the things I did well, the improvements I made and makes further suggestions for what we’ll work on next and things I should practice for a few days. I walk back to my car thinking golf is enjoyable and by the end of my lessons with this man, I’ll be able to at least play a creditable game of golf and not humiliate myself or my husband. It was an enjoyable hour. The pro walks back to the clubhouse thinking he has a student there he can work with and by the time I go on vacation, I’ll be playing gold fairly well for a beginner. Now this same pro has a lesson with my husband. He begins with the dog trainer chat and talks about his dog which refuses to sit when asked. My husband is wishing the golf could start. Then he launches into the discussion of golf and the purpose of lessons and what he’ll learn, etc. and my husband is now looking to see where the first tee is and hoping they can get down to hitting the ball. By the time they actually get to putting the ball down and picking up the club all my husband wants to do is whack some balls and get ready to play golf on vacation. He didn’t come out here to chat or discuss golf physics, he wants to play well and hit straight drives a very long distance. The pro notices that his student isn’t paying particularly good attention and begins to worry if this is one of those people who already knows it all and isn’t going to learn anything from him. When he watches my husband hit the ball he compliments him on his strength and hand to eye quickness. He doesn’t know if the compliment was even heard as another and still another ball is getting whacked down the fairway. He stops talking and just watches now as his student has begun to just work on his own, hitting every ball there to hit. When he’s finished hitting balls my husband smiles back at the instructor and waits to hear what he needs to do. The instructor doesn’t even know where to begin as he lost the student about 12 balls back. As they end their lesson and walk back to the car and the clubhouse respectively, my husband is thinking, “This guy doesn’t play golf, he discusses it. I didn’t learn a thing but I did get a little practice in.” The pro is thinking what a hard headed guy that was and it was likely he’d never be able to teach him anything without batting him over the head first so he’d pay attention. The pro never liked teaching the hard headed guys who didn’t want to listen or pay attention to details. Unhappy with the golf pro, my husband procures another one in hopes of making more progress in the time we have before vacation. Since I enjoyed myself so much in the first lesson, I look forward to the next lesson regardless who is teaching. The next time I go to the course and meet the new pro, he just says hello and walks to the tee area. I follow behind him wondering why we didn’t do more to introduce ourselves. He sets the balls down and tells me to hit a handful of them. That’s all he says. He doesn’t tell my what the goal of the lesson is, what he’d like me to do and what he expects me to get out of it, he just tells me to hit the balls – like I’m a mindless idiot or something. I’m uncomfortable with this but I do as I’m told and hit the balls rather tentatively. I wish I knew what we were working on. The first comment out of his mouth is “Wrong.” Wrong? What does wrong mean? What is that? I look at him frustrated and say “Wrong what?!” He says I hit it wrong, the club was angled wrong and my shoulders were wrong. I wait to hear him tell me how they are supposed to be and he says nothing. So I ask, “How am I supposed to hit them?” He tells me to do it again. Again? Wrong again? Why, how would that help? I don’t hit them, instead I demand he explain what I am supposed to do that would make it right. He gives me that look I’ve know so well for being a person needing explanations. He tells me to hit some again and he’ll tell me what to do after that. Now I hit the balls almost resentfully. I don’t care for this pro and frankly, I’m not having much fun. At the end of our lesson I’m frustrated and a little angry and so is my pro. I walk off thinking what a jerk this guy is compared to the other pro. The pro walks off thinking “Man I’m glad I’m not married to THAT woman.” What a hard head, I can’t imagine what it would be like living with her every day!! Now my husband and this pro get together. They meet at the course, shake hands and both walk wordlessly to the tee. The pro tosses down a handful of balls and says “hit these.” My husband is in hog heaven. He hits every one of them. At the end he turns and the pro says, “Wrong.” My husband says “Really? What was wrong?” The pro explains his shoulders are tilted and he club was turned. He drops another handful of balls and my husband hits each one – with his shoulders straight and his club perfectly aligned. They both smile. This is working. They spend longer than the allotted time because each time my husband does something a little off or a lot off, the pro says “That was way off, you have to do it better than that. What are you a teenage girl or something?” They both laugh and then my husband does everything right. As this lesson ends they are laughing and planning on shooting a few rounds together when we get back from Palm Springs. He thinks my husband is a great student and will be a good golfer and then feels very sorry for him given who his wife is. My husband feels the same way and can’t wait to actually play golf with this guy. So, which trainer was the good one? Which pro used the ‘right’ method to train his student? Conversely, which student was hard headed and which was easy to train? This is what happens in dog training every day. Is your student hard headed? Is it frustrating to try and teach them or do they seem to be oversensitive or worse yet, just not pay attention? Think about your student as you go about training. Make sure you’re the right trainer for that student. The overwhelming majority of training problems and behavior issues don’t stem from how you are teaching or your knowledge. Nor do they stem from the inadequacies of your student. They stem from the problems that existed between the pro’s and the students with which they did not ‘fit’. Figure that out and you’ll make amazing progress..
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Paul and Julie Knutson
46988 Weld County Road 42.5
Orchard, Colorado
80649
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